Fly Me to the School
by MRAY 4TW
Summary: Marco and Star take an alternative means to travel when they're late for school. For Barbacar. One-Shot.


**Fly Me to the School**

 **Been a while. In any case, I'm pushing a large number of updates to all my fics in a week-long spree, including posting a couple more stories to celebrate my Mega-Versary, for writing a MILLION words. It's been three years since I started, and I've never regretted coming to write fics on this site, not for a second. Thank you for your support, and enjoy.**

 **~ M. Ray 4 The Win.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Star Vs. the Forces of Evil.  
BTW, this is set during the earlier seasons before Star returns to Mewni.**

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"Gimme that comb!"

"I'm using it! Use your comb!"

"I CAN'T FIND IT!"

"Then clean YOUR side of the bathroom! It's too cluttered!" With more than enough force, Marco dragged the comb through his 'bed' hair and had to wince when he tugged at a few knots. "Agh! Dang it, Star! We're gonna be late! Why'd you mess with our alarms?!" After feeling that he'd spent enough time on his hair, he reached for his toothbrush and paste, before hesitating to go for his mouthwash instead. They were _that_ late.

"Oh sure, 'cause every day should start with a heart-attack!" Star replied sarcastically. "And after the fright is over, I just fall asleep again! In fact, the only reason I haven't smashed it is because my alarm is my phone!"

"Then why'd you turn off _my_ alarm?"

Star had no response to that, and she didn't know how to tell him.

The bathroom was already looking like a twister had passed through, Marco's side as much as Star's and the two teens nearly ripped their clothes trying to put them on. As they ran through the house to get to the front door, Marco could see clocks in every room telling him how late they were. By the time they got outside to the front yard, they could see that the school bus was far down the street; they'd never catch up to it. "Welp, that's it," he deadpanned. "My perfect attendance is gonna be ruined, I won't get to say 'hello' to Jackie, and you're gonna miss your chance to sign up for the Improv club. Just… perfect."

"It's not gonna go down like that!" Star said mischievously. The Diaz recognized her tone, and looked at her, slowly twirling her wand as if to indicate that she was considering using it to get them out of yet another mess. " _Easy Peasy Time Freez-"_

In a hurry, Marco clapped his hand over her mouth before she could finish saying the spell. In annoyance, Star nipped at his fingers to make him remove his hand, and the boy winced. "Ow! Did you just bite me?"

"Well, why'd you cover my mouth? I was just about to stop time so that we could get to school on time-"

"Have you FORGOTTEN what happened the last time you did that?" Marco asked incredulously.

"Pfft, of course not! We stopped time, we had fun, we got to school on time and… and…" Star trailed off, suddenly recalling how the day turned out and went quiet. " _Oh…_ "

"That's right. We couldn't get time started again! Let's just… run, or something! We can-" He was about to do just that and begin jogging, but the princess grabbed him by the shoulder.

"Nuh-uh! I've got a better idea!" Pointing her wand away from them to the middle of the front yard, she then thought of a conjuring spell. _"Glittering Travel Cannon!"_ True to her word, a massive pink stream jetted out of the star in her wand and spawned a large pink canon that was bejeweled all over with glittering crystals. Marco wasn't concerned about whether or not the jewels were precious or not. What had his concern, however, was the fact that there was a cannon with a massive opening pointing at them, and the fact that Star's spell had the word 'travel' in the name.

"Travel CANNON? Heck no!" Marco tried to scamper away. He'd already been in way too many magical shenanigans recently and was close to his limit. Before he could even make his escape, Star held onto him tight, before literally throwing him bodily into the open mouth of the cannon. Before he could even curse the fact that she was strong enough to even throw him, she jumped into the cannon and slid down the inside to meet him at the bottom, landing against him. "Star! Get us outta here! I can't get shot out of a cannon!"

"Oh, silly Marco!" she chided with a grin. "Of course _you_ can't, silly. We BOTH are! Cannon!" she shouted as if speaking to the cannon now, "point at School!"

"But Star!" Marco lunged from beside her and tried to climb out, but the inside of it was too slick and frictionless. It even became more difficult as the cannon began to alter itself to point in the School's direction, and then aimed upwards diagonally to the sky. Marco's fears suddenly intensified when he saw the clear blue sky. "Cannons EXPLODE!"

"I know! **Fun** , right?"

There was now the sound of a clicking sound, with one-second intervals. Marco thought it sounded like some sort of mechanical fuse, and he very nearly wet himself then and there. "We're gonna die-!"

Then everything exploded.

Death was surprisingly colorful.

In a rainbow-colored thunderous explosion, the two teens were literally shot into the wild blue beyond.

"AaaaaaggggGGHHHH **HHHH**!" Marco screamed.

"YeeeeeaaaaAAAAHH **HHHH!** " Star cheered as she enjoyed one of the better thrills of her life. In the meantime, Marco was busy trying to keep his pants dry. In their shooting force, their lack of aerodynamics began to drag against them, and their faces began to contort as the wind blew into their faces. "WhoooHoooo!" Star yelled in glee, though the wind carried her shout away. "This is fun, right Marco?!"

His only response was to scream as he saw the town speeding by far below him. "We're goin' to diiieee-!" He didn't even say anymore as a passing bug got unintentionally swallowed by the unfortunate teen.

Star actually had the nerve to roll her eyes as Marco choked, screamed and cried all at the same time. "You're so melodramatic."

At school, Ferguson and Alphonso were walking into the school by means of the front double doors. To them both, they believed that they could hear what sounded like faraway screaming. Ferguson turned and looked around, but could see no one… until he thought he saw something in the sky that seemed to get closer by the second. "Oh, hey…. A shooting star…?"

"What?" Alphonso turned and looked to his friend, who was pointing at something in the sky. Being the geekier of the two, he was about to explain the premise of falling meteorites and their visibility, before Ferguson slapped him, and shook him by the shoulder.

"No, you idiot! It's STAR! Star Butterfly!"

"Wha?" Alphonso adjusted his glasses, trying to see through the lens glare. "Well, I'll be-"

"THEY'RE COMING RIGHT AT US!" Ferguson started freaking out when he saw that the two teens were looming closer and closer. They're gonna crash here! How the heck are they gonna land?!"

Far up above, Marco was screaming the exact same thing.

"I got it handled! _Soft Shimmering Sphere!_ " Star waved her wand and a transparent bubble with inside padding formed around the two cannon-shot teens who were now falling at insane speeds. "Hold onto something, Marco!"

"Hold onto _**what**_?!" In those final few seconds, he reached out and grabbed the closest thing he could, and braced for impact. One soon came, and they hit the ground with a low bounce and smashed through Alphonso and Ferguson who were running around like headless chickens. The madness, nor did the ball stop there; it barreled through the open doorways of the school and sped through the hallways like a hamster-ball steamroller. Even the spoiled rich girl Brittney Wong ended up rolled over along with several other people, and the ball kept on laying waste to the hallways. It finally smashed apart at the doorway to their class. "AAAAAGGGGHHHH!" Marco yelled at the top of his lungs. "AAAGGGGGHHH-!"

"Marco. Marco. Marco!" Star scolded. "We made it."

"You certainly made it, all right," Ms. Skullnick said from where she stood at the front of the class, staring through the door at the destruction that had followed in the wake of the landing ball. "You made thousands and thousands of dollars worth of damage!" In fury, the teacher glared at her two students who had come to rest sitting on the ground. "And why are you two hugging like that?"

"Hugging?" Marco looked down, only to see that he was clutching Star tightly, and she was the exact same. Both realizing this, they blushed hotly and hurriedly let go of one another, even going as far as to scoot away from one another. "Hugging? What hugging?"

The troll woman lifted an eyebrow. "O…kay." Another set of students started to come in, weaving their way around the two teens on the floor, though there was one girl who did so far too slowly for Ms. Skullnick's liking. "Janna, stop shuffling and get to your seat."

"Don't sweat it, teach." Janna looked down and saw Star and Marco and grinned wryly in amusement. "I saw what happened in the hallway, you guys. Why'd you do that?"

"We got shot… out of a _cannon_." Marco said simply, still not able to believe it himself.

"And the rough landing in a ball? Heck of a way to travel… say, why didn't you two use your dimensional scissors?"

"I forgot about those. Whoops," Star laughed sheepishly.

"Dimensional… scissors?" Marco parroted dumbly, as he thought of how he'd nearly died, nearly made a mess of himself, caused a lot of unnecessary damage and-

"Hey Marco," Jackie said as she walked into class past him with her skateboard under her arm. "Wicked entrance."

Marco smiled normally, yet internally, was insanely happy that his crush had complimented him. "Oh… hey Jackie." Turning to Star as they both got up, he whispered in her ear. "We're doing this again tomorrow."

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 **First time writing with humor first in mind; trying to do comedy, that is. Well, I guess that's it. Barbacar, hope you liked it.**

 **Valete!**


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